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President Quayle, what was the first thing you did
after taking office following the tragedy
yesterday?
The real question you asked is whether I'm qualified
for the presidency. There are three major issues
confronting our nation -- arms control and national
security, education and jobs, and the budget deficit. I
served 12 years in the U.S. Congress, along with my time as
vice-president. I have had more experience in dealing with
these issues than Ronald Reagan did when he took office, so
I am amply qualified for the presidency.
Mr. President, many of your colleagues in both the
house and senate -- including people of your own party --
were somewhat unimpressed by your performance there. Could
you explain why that might be so?
Again, you're asking the same question, whether I'm
qualified for the presidency. Our nation faces three major
concerns -- arms control and national security, education
and jobs, and the budget deficit. I grappled with these for
12 years in Congress, more years than George Washington
served when he assumed office. I am experienced and
qualified. I know a throw weight from a MIRV, and I am
prepared to negotiate arms control. Next?
President Quayle, what is your agenda for your
presidency?
I don't believe that question is appropriate at this
time. But it goes back to whether I'm qualified to lead
this nation, which as three vital issues before it: arms
control and national security, education and jobs, and the
budget deficit. I faced these concerns on a daily basis for
a dozen years in Congress, more years than a fellow
Midwestern patriot, Abraham Lincoln, served before becoming
president.
Mr. President, do you believe you will have any
difficulty gaining the confidence of the American
people?
Again, you're really asking whether I'm qualified for
the job, and I've already answered that question three or
four times today. But I want you pointy-headed lib'rals in
the Democrat media to know that the American people believe
that America is the envy of the world.
President Quayle, do you have any specific plans for
domestic issues, such as education and drugs?
Why do you keep bringing up my academic record? I've
never claimed that I was more than an average student in
college. And drugs are our number one problem, which we
will solve by using the death penalty against drug
kingpins.
But Mr. President, you have said that the most
significant issues were arms control and national security,
education and jobs, and the budget deficit. You didn't even
mention drugs, and now you say they're our number-one
problem. Does this mean a reversal of previous policy, and
that you will seek the death penalty against that notorious
drug trafficker, Gen. Manuel Noriega?
Again, you keep asking me about my qualifications for
the presidency, and I'm getting tired of answering the same
question. We will continue to move this nation forward. I
have met with President Bush's people, all of whom I know
on a first-hand basis, and most of them are staying on.
There will be a few new appointments.
Can you tell us about them, Mr. President?
Bobby Knight will become secretary of defense, while
Tom Clancy has agreed to be my national security advisor.
Next?
President Quayle, what will be the philosophy of your
presidency?
I will always remember something an old Midwestern
neighbor told me. Now I know, those elitist Massachusetts
intellectual snobs may think it's corny and just plain old
common sense, and they'll sneer at it, but I know that I
and millions of other real Americans believe in the wisdom
of the heartland. And this man said that
Maybe you can't
make a silk purse out of a sow's ear, but if you work hard
at it, precious few folks will notice the difference.
I've
always cherished that advice, and I'm going to live by
that, no matter what those eggheads say. Thank you, and
good night.
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