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Names in the news

Published 19-Apr-1989 in the Denver Post
Copyright ©1989 by Ed Quillen. All rights reserved.

One way that some people gain a degree of immortality is through eponyms -- words that started out as proper names.

For instance, every time someone is accused of chauvinism or of behaving like a chauvinist, we are invoking Nicolas Chauvin of Rochefort, a much-wounded veteran of the Napoleonic wars who maintained a loud, simple-minded and obsessive admiration of Napoleon. The French press of the 1830's enjoyed making fun of Chauvin's fixation, and thus a word evolved.

Silhouette similarly honors Etienne de Silhouette, a parsimonious French minister of finance in 1759. His work was apparently all shadow and no substance, and so his name became a byword.

It isn't just the French who have enriched our language. Boycott commemorates Charles Cunningham Boycott, a retired British army captain who in 1873 became the resident manager of an English earl's Irish estates. When famine loomed in 1879, Boycott refused to reduce rents.

In retaliation, the Irish tenant farmers refused to communicate with him in any way whatsoever. Capt. Boycott was shunned and ostracized during his career, and for the past century, his name has become a common response when people feel put upon by outside powers.

Many other names have become words -- sandwich, jezebel, guillotine, baedeker, derrick, bowdlerize, mesmerize, lynch, bloomers, hooker, sadist, quisling, to name a few -- but sadly, Colorado has not yet contributed any eponyms to the Official English language. We could try, though. Here's a two-career couple talking over the day's events.

How was your day, honey?

Not that hot. Thought I'd relax by myself over coffee and the paper when I went out for breakfast this morning, and just as soon as I got comfortable, this guy came up and started romering at me about the airport. It was even worse than when we got penaed at church last week.

But your day must have gone better than mine. We had our proposal ready to go at work today, and I thought it looked pretty good and everything was set to go. Then the boss chenowethed it and said he had a lot of questions we hadn't answered. He'd been all for it before, and I can't figure out why he pulled a kirscht and changed sides. I don't know what we're going to do now. I was so upset. I was scared I might just start schroedering, right there in front of everybody.

Well at least you knew where your boss stood. When I got to work, I found out that my marketing plan got wirthed, and I don't know if it will ever get out of limbo.

Don't worry, dear. If you really got wirthed, then when somebody else makes a decision, you'll find out what your boss was thinking. When you should worry is if your plan gets bledsoed, and then it will vanish into strickland, never to be seen again. By the way, how did we come out on our taxes this year?

We really got paulsoned. I sure wish we could get somebody to armstrong an amendment to the tax laws just for us. I don't know what this country's coming to, all this money going to keeping clinically dead people alive for another week or two, and all these services that probably go to illegal immigrants that don't even know how to read or write philips. As a society, we're just not anschutz enough to afford all that. And on a personal level, our checking account looks so strang right now that I'm going to have to schuck and put in more time on the job and spend less time on community things.

Please, dear, don't start lamming again. It might make you feel better, but if you keep that up, you'll get to be such a shroyer that nobody will listen to you.

Sorry. I guess I'm in a berg mood. I wanted to take the bus to work today, but it got considined and I had to drive. That's aggravating.

Not as aggravating as what your son did. The school called and said he quillened again today. He's turning into a real discipline problem.

Well, just as long as he's not harting around with some little bimbo.


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