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I'm a sucker for surveys, so when I saw the Best of
Colorado
questionnaire in yesterday's paper, I couldn't
help but fill it out.
1. Best ski run. I don't ski, other than sporadic cross-country forays. But the essence of the alpine sport is sliding down on steep slopes, and the stretch of I-70 from Silverthorne to Frisco offers a long, treacherous grade and plenty of thrills. I once slid down it backward in a '67 Chevy during a May blizzard. Crow Hill on U.S. 285 is pretty good, too, and Floyd Hill can hold its own.
2. Best pizza. Let me put it this way. If your car needs a grease job, feed it a Loaf-and-Jug pizza. If you have a pathological craving for cardboard, order a Tombstone in a bar. All other pizza tastes quite good by comparison.
3. Most romantic spot. There are some bluffs near Greeley called the Cat Hills, which were a scenic place for teen-aged boys to park with teen-aged girls. That should qualify, but on the other hand, now that I'm the father of a teen-aged girl, my opinions are subject to change.
4. Best athlete. Who cares?
5. Best fishing spot. If I knew, would I tell you?
6. Best politician. That's like asking for the best disease. They're all in business because they think they know more about how to spend your money than you do, and they believe there is a difference between theft and taxation.
7. Best refried beans. Refried beans are like rice; they have no real flavor of their own. So who has the best chili verde to slosh over the frijoles refritos? You can't go real wrong in any cantina south of Poncha Pass.
8. Best newspaper columnist. Modesty forbids me from answering this honestly.
9. Best place to meet people: Laundromats.
10. Best place to escape tourists. I knew Fort Morgan could win something here.
11. Best night spot. We have only one, the Victoria Tavern. Fortunately, it offers Negra Modelo beer at reasonable prices and good bluesy rock bands on most weekends. What more do you need?
12. Best radio station. KIMN in 1967, or KFML in 1973. They all seem to have gone downhill since then.
13. Best view. Try the west side of Slumgullion Pass, where you see the core of the San Juans in all their glory.
14. Best place to work. Home. It's an idiot-free environment, there are no supervisors or time clocks, nobody cares what you wear to work, and commuting is a snap.
15. Best neighborhood. I'd like to know. Where we used
to live, my responsible neighbors always said things like
Mr. Quillen, it's too bad you don't have more time for
your lawn.
In the new one, the happily unemployed guy
across the street is always inviting me over for beer and
some black-powder shooting -- at 10 a.m. on a weekday.
There must be a happy medium somewhere.
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