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Books you can't give this year

Published 28-Nov-1990 in the Denver Post
Copyright ©1990 by Ed Quillen. All rights reserved.

Most bookstores would go out of business if they didn't have December, their busiest month, when people shop for books to give as presents. Unfortunately, even though a thousand titles are published every week in America, I still haven't been able to find certain books which would be interesting or useful gifts:

· Cocaine Psychosis. Revisionist historians have been having a field day with Sigmund Freud lately, attacking major tenets of psychoanalysis like the seduction theory, or pointing out the similarity between Freudianism and religious cults. But nobody has gone after the big issue. Freud used a lot of cocaine, and anyone who has spent much time around cokeheads (my experience came when I edited a newspaper in a ski resort a dozen years ago) will tell you that cokeheads think they know everything, and have elaborate theories to support their inane and interminable babble.

Could it be that id, ego, superego, penis envy, Oedipus complex and all the rest of Freudianism were not the product of profound scientific insight, but merely the result of too many trips to the cocaine bottle? There's a book I'd love to read.

· The Ms. Manners' Guide to Politically Correct Speech and Writing. I bet a lot of people are like me -- we don't want to give gratuitous offense (i.e., when I offend people, I want to know I'm doing it, and I prefer the offense be over matters of substance, not terminology).

However, when practicing non-offensive speech or writing, it is difficult to know whether to use black, African-American, or person of color. Or whether the acceptable term this week is disabled, handicapped, differently enabled or physically challenged. Or if we should speak of the poor, the underclass or the economically impaired. Do we still use awkward locutions like s/he or he or she, or do we use the plural but genderless pronoun they with a singular antecedent, as in Everyone will take their chair?

Ideally, this vital reference book would come with monthly, or perhaps even weekly, updates.

· Lifestyles of the Poor and Unknown. Sure, it's interesting to see how an environmentally conscious Hollywood star saves the planet while jetting between mansions and avoiding red meat. But let's get real. A Newsweek cover just asked How Safe is your Job? Tenure laws are being abolished, government employees go without pay, and even IBM has talked of lay-offs. There is no such thing as job security these days.

If you live from paycheck to paycheck like most Americans, you'll certainly want a handy source of information about where to find food-laden Dumpsters, how to hop freights, thrift-store shopping, and which bridges offer the best sleeping arrangements.


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