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Like many painful New Year's resolutions, this one did not get implemented immediately. However, the time has come for two things: the annual Dr. Strangelove Party, and to correct the mistakes made here during the preceding year.
The major blooper was on Dec. 5, when I said the legislature could have legalized gambling if it wanted to. It was my understanding that the prohibition against gambling was statutory, not constitutional.
Rep. Jerry Kopel pointed out that I was dead wrong. If towns besides Central City, Blackhawk and Cripple Creek want low-stakes gambling, they'll need a statewide vote.
He also mentioned that poker is already legal on Indian reservations, and that with a few formalities, other games of chance could be, without a public vote. If you're eager to build a modern casino in Colorado, try Ignacio.
On March 27, I erred about Cripple Creek. Its old
tenderloin is Myers Avenue,
not Meyers
Avenue.
The thoroughfare was named for Julius Myers,
who platted the town, along with Horace Bennett.
It was later named Julian Street, for reasons too involved to explain here, and I don't know whether the formal name now is Myers Avenue or Julian Street. Perhaps we can get an official statement from the Cripple Creek government.
My political memory slipped on March 25. I said Peter Dominick was defeated by Floyd Haskell. Actually, Haskell beat Gordon Allott in 1972, and Gary Hart defeated Dominick in 1974.
Does a felony conviction cost you your right to vote? I thought so on April 24, but I got a letter that said otherwise. The local elections clerk wasn't sure, and suggested I call the secretary of state's office.
After only three minutes on long-distance hold (has our state government ever heard of 800 numbers, or are you not a real citizen if you don't live in the Denver dialing area?), I learned that if you're serving your sentence -- that is, in the slam, or on probation -- then you can't vote. But once the sentence is completed, you can vote.
On May 29, I blew it twice. In reference to the Royal Gouge, a/k/a the Royal Gorge, I said it cost $2 a head to enter. It's actually $6, a fact not mentioned on any of the signs along the highway.
I also then predicted that Hunter Thompson would get a stiffer sentence on drug charges in Aspen than Claudine Longet did for killing her roommate. However, all charges against Thompson were later dropped. So much for my talents at necromancy.
Normally, we hold our Dr. Strangelove Party during Mud Season, in April when there's nothing else to do. But President Bush pushed up the schedule this year. We have no choice but to find the video, call friends who share a mordant sense of humor, and watch other people make mistakes. It's only a movie, right?
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