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Curious as to the official line on Columbus Day controversies, I called my favorite inside source -- Ananias Ziegler, director of media relations for the Committee That Really Runs America.
The first thing you have to understand is that
Columbus Day isn't really about Columbus,
he said.
When he died in 1506 of syphilis that he acquired from
the New World, he was sure he had sailed to the Malay
peninsula and archipelago. Missing by 10,000 miles is not
the accomplishment of a great navigator.
But even if Columbus didn't know what he did, didn't he forever change the course of history?
Not exactly,
Ziegler patiently explained. If
Columbus hadn't made the connection, someone else would
have within a few years; the technology and the temper of
the times coincided then. The contention could just as
easily be about Ojeda Day or La Cosa Day.
And then Alonso de Ojeda or Juan de La Cosa would be accused of starting five centuries of genocide?
Maybe. But keep in mind that if Columbus really meant
to exterminate the native population of the Americas -- and
though he sought to conquer, exploit and enslave, there's
no evidence that he ever desired to annihilate the
indigenous population -- he was inept. As best we know,
there were about 10 million people, many of them busy
enslaving, conquering, sacrificing and eating each other
when Columbus arrived in the Americas. Now they have
perhaps 300 million descendants. How can anybody call that
genocide?
So despite his evil intent, Columbus wasn't even efficient at being a white Euro-cultured hetero-patriarchal genocidal oppressor. Why is there a Columbus Day?
Only recently has it become a federal holiday,
largely by the efforts of Rep. Peter Rodino. The holiday
represents the political clout of Italian-Americans, in the
same way that Martin Luther King Day represents
African-Americans. But even at that, it's rather
inappropriate.
Why?
Columbus may have been born in Genoa, but he made his
career in Portugal and Spain. He fought against Italians.
He never considered himself Italian. And even if he were an
Italian, you'd think that a people who could produce a
Michelangelo, an Enrico Fermi and a Leonardo da Vinci could
find a better symbol.
So why is there a Columbus Day?
At the Committee, we delight in those annual
protests, like this year's battle in Denver, with Russell
Means and the American Indian Movement going against the
Italian-American community's parade.
The Committee That Really Runs America delights in these conflicts?
Damn right. If the Italians and Indians are fighting
each other, while the rest of you look on, it diverts your
attention. You won't notice that the national debt -- the
largest transfer of wealth in history from labor to capital
-- is now the largest item in the federal budget. If you're
fighting about Columbus Day, you're not fighting against
the 10 percent of the population that controls 80 percent
of the wealth, and you won't think about the appalling
conditions on most reservations. You don't even care that
most schoolchildren don't know Columbus from a
coulomb.
So Columbus Day is a deliberate diversion?
Let me put it this way. If the Indians keep going
after the Italian-Americans who just want to hold a parade,
they sure won't be coming after us.
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