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You'd think that after last year's presidential
election, family values
would join the missile gap,
Quemoy and Matsu, bimetallism and the Tariff of
Abominations in the arcana of obsolete campaign themes.
But a full-page ad in Sunday's Post (it was in the right
place, the comics section) urged us to sign petitions if we
are outraged with the way TV, movies, music-videos and
records are destroying traditional family values.
The only family I can reasonably speak of is my own,
where music-videos and recordings have not perturbed family
life beyond occasional shouts of Turn it down.
The American Family Association charges that modern
recordings blatantly encourage sex.
But that's
hardly a new problem. The oldest lyrics I can find contain
phrases like thy breasts are like two young roes
and
the joints of thy thighs are like jewels
-- that's
from Song of Solomon in the Bible, written about 3,000
years ago.
Regarding cinema, the Family Association complains of
an endless stream of films filled with profanity,
nudity, sex, violence and killings.
Film critic Michael
Medved lamented the same trend in Hollywood vs.
America.
Nobody seems to realize that this is not a result of any back-room cabal plot to inflict perverse tastes on the good people of America.
Hollywood is in business to make money. If Sadist
Slashers of San Francisco,
starring Sharon Stone,
grosses $40 million in its first week, and Wholesome
Heartland,
starring Jimmy Stewart and Nancy Davis,
grosses $10, then we'll see more of Sharon Stone, if
possible.
As H.L. Mencken observed, No one ever went broke
underestimating the taste of the American public.
If we
want something besides schlock, all we have to do is
support it. Hollywood will meet our demand; the beauty of a
free market is that no Family Association petitions are
necessary.
Shame on NBC,
the ad proclaims. Not for faking
news, but for allowing Saturday Night Live.
In our household, we often gather on Saturday night with our children, and sometimes their friends, to enjoy Saturday Night Live.
I naively thought that when parents and children did
something together, it encouraged traditional family
values,
but the Family Association says that my
daughters will get corrupted if they're home watching
Saturday Night Live rather than, say, parked on the local
Lovers' Lane with a boyfriend and a pint of sloe gin.
Curious logic. But we'll miss it this week anyway. I
must venture to the People's Republic of Boulder for a
discussion of Is Denver Necessary?
with Patty
Limerick, Bill Hornby, Charles Wilkinson, Tom Noel and
others.
The argument starts at 7:30 p.m. Saturday in the Boulder Public Library, and it's free and open to the public. Come see us if you can get your VCR to tape Headbanger's Ball and Saturday Night Live.
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