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Amid the past-due bills and coffee spills are a few questions sent by devoted readers, and I might as well answer them so that I can get on with cleaning my desk:
Q. Will Rep. Dan Rostenkowski get off?
A. Certainly. He's from Chicago, and he's made his
career in Washington. All he has to do is point out that
his formative days in Chicago politics, followed by a
career in Washington, have infused him with the custom
and culture
of those places. He is a victim of society,
and to subject him to fine or imprisonment merely for
abiding by local folkways would be cruel and unusual
punishment indeed.
And besides, the people of Chicago presumably know his character, and they keep re-electing him. Aren't they entitled to representation?
Q. After lying to Congress and expressing his contempt for the institution, how will Oliver North fit into the U.S. Senate if Virginia voters elect him in November?
A. Tough one to answer. Lowering the moral character of the U.S. Senate is a big job, but if anyone is up to the challenge, it's Ollie North.
Q. Unemployment is lower than it has been in years and factory orders are up. There's no inflation to speak of. So why is Wall Street nervous, and why does the Fed keep raising interest rates?
A. Raising interest rates means fewer people can afford to borrow money, which reduces demand for goods and services, and therefore counters any tendency to inflation. The prospect of inflation upsets Wall Street because the higher the interest rate, the lower the price of bonds, and when bond prices fall, some bond traders lose money.
Western Civilization would end if bond traders lost money, and so it's vital to keep them happy, even if it means that millions of Americans who could afford houses in February can't afford them in June. Note also if things are good on Main Street, then Wall Street panics because the wrong people are making money.
This is an example of how our great capitalist institutions serve us, and anyone who questions this wonderful system must be a socialist or worse. If you'd signed your name, I'd do the patriotic thing and turn you over to the FBI.
Q. I live in the boondocks, and yet all the time I must read about urban crime. Why should I care?
A. It does matter if you live in the hinterland. For one thing, when crime rises in the city, more people flee to the outback. Some of these refugees are bigots, and there's already an ample supply in most rural areas.
For another, rural police agencies use urban crime as an excuse to play major-league games. Just last week, they set up a random-check roadblock outside Salida, complete with spotters to see if anyone tossed anything out of a car before reaching the roadblock.
Why the roadblock? The local cops said that urban gangs were running drugs and guns up the U.S. 285 corridor because I-25 was getting too hot for them.
So, if you want to go about your business in the boonies without undue police interference, you'd better hope that urban gangs settle down.
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