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Protecting children for fun and profit

Published 2 December 1997 in The Denver Post
Copyright ©1997 by Ed Quillen. All rights reserved.

Let's see if I understand the current social trend correctly. It takes money to live in America, but most people don't inherit nearly enough. So they have to work.

One job doesn't provide enough money, so there are two wage-earners in many households. If there's only one parent, that parent has to take an outside job on account of welfare reform -- the constitution of the old Soviet Union contained a clause requiring every citizen to work, and we've apparently borrowed that provision.

The adults are experiencing their careers, but the children need care. So, instead of questioning a social and economic system that is deliberately designed to children of parental attention, the adults turn to government for solutions.

And government responds with a host of measures to protect children so that the labor pool will be as large as possible, thereby keeping wages low and preventing inflation. As we all know, terrible things will happen if you make an extra $5,000 in a year, but good things happen if Phil Anschutz makes an extra $1.5 billion in a year.

So, to keep our civilization from collapsing, government at all levels must protect children so that their parents are free to toil for low wages.

This explains a lot of things, such as School District 11 in Colorado Springs, which suspended an elementary student for sharing lemon gumdrops -- when there's a War on Drugs, we can't be too careful, you know.

Parents who don't have time for such folderol expect the school to protect their children from all chemical substances -- which covers just about everything on earth, including air and food and water, except perhaps plasma in fusion-research laboratories.

Then there's the response to a Massachusetts murder. Our betters, who have better things to do than raise their own children, tell us that closer regulation is needed for the au pair program, lest some other imported nanny go berserk. This means higher taxes, of course, but who among us is not willing to subsidize these poor, oppressed dual-career parents who are just too overwhelmed to tend to any children they brought into the world?

And there's the do-gooder criticism of the National Rifle Association's Eddie Eagle program, which stresses things like gun safety and that kids should not touch any firearm they might find lying around.

In a country with so many guns, this sounds like plain common sense, but the critics say it is instilling the gun culture into American youngsters, thereby making them future NRA members.

A moment's thought would reveal that there's no reason for such worries. My own generation produced hordes of pacifists, anti-war activists and the like, yet we were steeped in the gun culture during our youth: John Wayne movies, BB guns, lots of World War II surplus stuff to play with, ranging from smoke grenades to Enfields.

In short, a pervasive gun culture produces more pacifists than it does militiamen, but mere truth has never bothered do-gooders before in their desire to get the government to relieve parents of the time-consuming, job-wasting chores of tending their children.

Yesterday, various technology and media companies announced their plans to prevent children from accessing adult-oriented material on the global computer network.

In other words, some voluntary censorship is coming because influential modern parents are too busy to hang around when their children are on-line, and the big companies in this business -- America On-Line, Disney -- want to get bigger.

They're worried that if parents are leery of what their kids might encounter on the Internet, then the network won't grow into a mass medium.

If families feel it's not a family place, there's no way it's going to become as popular as televisions, according to Jake Winebaum, who runs Disney's on-line division.

Right. And if it becomes as banal and lowest-common-denominator as television, why do we need it if we already have TV networks?

A sensible society would figure that the Internet does one thing, and television another. It wouldn't try to turn one into the other, so that big media companies can get even bigger, all in the guise of protecting children.

This imaginary sensible society might also conclude that it probably doesn't matter all that much what children are exposed to anyway -- people who grew up a century ago amid legal heroin and open prostitution still went on to live stable and productive lives -- and so controlling what children are exposed to is not any reason to suspend lemon-drop pushers and the Bill of Rights.

And in the sensible society, if parents think it's important to control what their children see, they're perfectly free to do so.

But in our society, we want parents out there toiling, so that they don't have time for their children, and it's little wonder that the parents turn to government for help. Too bad they don't challenge the entire system, so that they might have time to do it themselves.


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